Do you ever feel frozen by self-doubt or insecurity? Unable to progress even though all you want to do is move forward?
I’m having one of those days. I’ve been trying to complete a project with my inner critic harping on me. It’s kept me stuck! It’s taking me a day and a half to accomplish something that would typically take a few hours.
I understand the incessant hammering of my critic was born from a protective impulse to keep me “safe” but it’s just not helpful. It turns my own power against me and it’s all based on F.E.A.R. (False Evidence Appearing Real)
She’s really quite a drama queen and alarmist!
I want to tell her it’s not that big of a deal (because it isn’t) and to chill out.
When I can step back and have some humor it does loosen her grip but when I’m in a frozen F.E.A.R. state I have the best success with a Sacred Feminine wisdom approach.
Here are the 5 Sacred Feminine Wisdom Steps to shift the frozen F.E.A.R.:
1. Slow down, take a deep breath and place your hand on your belly. Recognize there is an old belief or story fueling the F.E.A.R.
2. Take another deep breath. Sigh as you exhale. Open to curiosity. What is the belief fueling this? What is that old story about? Where does it live in your body?
3. Bring a gently breath to meet the feeling place in your body. Let your breath wash over the place of tension.
4. Feel your feet on the ground and look around you. Notice something in your environment that supports you. Ie. A tree outside your window, a photo of a loved one, a bird singing, etc.
5. From this new perspective ask yourself what does my inner wisdom know? Take another deep breath, get quiet and listen.
Repeat as needed.
The self-doubt and F.E.A.R. put us into a trance that cut us off from our resources and our power. To break the trance we practice coming back to our bodies and our inner wisdom. As we strengthen our connection to those inner resources we can unwind the old beliefs and rewrite the stories at the base of our insecurity and self-doubt.
I teach this process to the women I work with so they can feel stronger and more confident in themselves. When you’re connected to your inner resources you can begin to risk and live from more spontaneity and openness.
You can pursue your dreams and desires with more ease and self-assurance. Begin to live your life on your own terms.
When the F.E.A.R. comes up it can be tempting to push and blast through our “blocks” but it always creates more resistance. Using this Sacred Feminine Wisdom approach is more effective and provides permanent results. Once you’ve melted the frozen F.E.A.R. it never returns in quite the same way.
If you’d like to explore other Sacred Feminine approaches to healing insecurity, doubt and self-judgment I’ve created a one-month journey to support women like you.
Starting in April, No Apology Necessary! (You Are Enough) will provide you an opportunity to learn and practice a Sacred Feminine approach to thawing frozen F.E.A.R., rewriting the outdated story at it’s root and creating a new foundation to live with clarity, confidence and joy.
I’d love to have you join me.
Many times old fears come back because something “triggered” them. This means that we should pay closer attention to it because we probably have uncovered a new layer of that fear. Thank you for the great reading.
Zaria
You’er so right Zaria. When we can examine our fear from a less reactive state we can get to its roots and let it go. Thanks for your insights.
Joni
This is a perfect post for me this week, I am frozen in fear based on setbacks that happened last week! Thank you for the wisdom!
So glad to hear it resonated for you Karen. It can feel so challenging when we’re in the thick of it. xo
These are steps that work, Joni! Thanks for sharing your wisdom.
Thanks Laurie!
Love this post Joni. The ‘inner critic’ is trying to protect us, but ignore her and you know the saying, “What you resist persists.” Your wisdom steps are excellent. Melt the F.E.A.R!
Yes Debra! As the Queen of Courage, I know you’re an authority on this subject. xo
Thank you for sharing this! Very helpful- and easy to practice any time,any where!
So glad you found it helpful Colleen. Thanks for stopping by.
That inner critic is a stinker that I am working on loving. I enjoyed reading about your five steps. I like how these steps bring a person into a new awareness and grounding. Thanks for this blog writing, Joni! xx
Yes the critic can make it challenging at times! And love with firm limits always helps. Thanks for sharing Lisa.
xo Joni